Al Dente: the perfect balance between soft and hard.
this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2025
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Jon Reremy
That One Guy.
"Ugh why is That One Guy suddenly in all the porn? He really ruins it!"
Two-Tone Malone?
I'd go with something that has a little more class than most of the suggestions here. Something with a certain ring to it. Like... Biggus Dickus
What's so funny about 'Biggus Dickus'?
I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'.
Ghonna Reah.
Rock Hardman
A Hideo Kojima inspired porno, no doubt.
Probably: Ho Lee Fuk
I'm ethnic Chinese so that makes it even better
The airline pilot?!?
You may be thinking of Bam Ding Ow.
I think they were referring to Wi To Lo.
Ugot Badtaste
If you're watching me then you definitely do. Lol
Standard rules. Middle name and the street you grew up on.
Alan Woodbine.
Johnson Street would be great for this… if I had one.
Francisco 22...
Jared 832N County. Sexy
Dave.
No last name, just Dave.
Thanks! I was just looking for this joke the other day
I would go through LinkedIn and pick a person at random, use their name with the exact same spelling and any alphabet soup they have behind their name
Jerry Thompson, Esq Mary Kowalski, F.A.C.S. Dr. Alan Carter, DDS, FACP
These are all fake btw. I mean they may not be but if they are it’s genuinely a coincidence. That would be so weird
Too Many Pancakes.
Because I'm fat but flat.
Fair lmao
My last name is a gemstone that is already used by strippers/pornstars often so I would probably keep that as the second part of my name but come up with something funny and/or masculine sounding for the first part since I'm a straight guy and not a female stripper/porn star.
Fuck it ill go with Dick Diamond.
Is this Jack Ruby's lemmy account?
Gives you a opportunity for great catch phrase:
"I'm as hard as a diamond" "Dont bite this diamond" "This diamond performs under intense heat and pressure"
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(2 replies)
Chode Loadington
And I, Load Chodington, will be your arch nemesis and steal all your roles.
Roy Mustang. Always thought that guy was wasting his time in the military with a name like that
Nano Soft
Silky Johnson
Richard McGusherblaster
Probably something with "Bear“ and "small“ like BearySmalls or something idk I’m a short and very obese hetero guy - no one would wanna watch me besides a few FFAs whose preferences I cover.
Busting balkaner
Average Richard
Nice Cockbra
G Hitman
D O N G
Id use my real first name but then disguise my identity by using johnson as a last name.
[Lester the Molester Cockenschtuff
Or maybe Pete Jonze ](https://clip.cafe/zack-miri-make-a-porno-2008/who-are-again-lester/)
Dru Peacock
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