Ive seen this term a few times, but never an explanation. As a person that (mostly) associates themselves with being Bi, ive never experienced any sort of "cycle". Its it just an internet injoke (cause it sounds like bicycle).

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[–] Andreas@feddit.dk 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Before reading the comments here, I was going to say that it's a negative stereotype combined with a lame pun that is pushed by straight and gay people to "prove" that bisexuals are not suitable for long-term relationships as they will eventually lose attraction to their partner's gender and cheat on them with the other gender. I don't stop finding men attractive when I find a woman attractive and vice versa so the bicycle stereotype is not relatable to me. For the people here who genuinely experience a bicycle, how does it interfere with relationships?

[–] nanometre@beehaw.org 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I mean, straight people will also notice attractive people out and about, even if they're fully committed. That's not what makes someone cheat. Same for pan/bi people.

Both my partner and I are into any/all genders and both experience the "bi-cycle". It does not change my attraction to my partner, as we are bonded so strongly already (and not just because of whatever gender preference we might have had at that time), plus any person can have masc and/or femme (or neither) qualities to their personality and looks anyway.

But we're both also strongly monogamous. I pour my energy into my partner, regardless of who might catch my eye a bit out in public.

What we personally do is lean into it more, whichever way we're leaning, but we also both enjoy playing with gender and sexuality expression.

What I mean by that is: use different toys in bed, experiment with clothes for ourselves/each other, lean harder into one type of expression for a while... Just go with the flow really and enjoy it for what it is.

Most importantly: We can be open with each other about it.

[–] Andreas@feddit.dk 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thanks for the insight. I'm aware that bisexuals aren't more prone to cheating since I'm bisexual and monogamous myself, but the majority of straight and gay people I talk to have this assumption that all bisexuals experience the bicycle and they avoid bisexual partners for that reason. Physical attraction is the most significant part of sexuality to me (if I'm emotionally but not physically attracted, that person would just be a friend) so the bicycle stereotype of switching attraction between masculine and feminine physiques would imply that I will lose attraction to a partner completely on a scheduled basis. Therefore, I try to challenge the stereotype whenever I see it. But I understand now that the bicycle won't cause problems if the person is most attracted to personality or if the partner's appearance is fluid.

[–] nanometre@beehaw.org 1 points 1 year ago

But I understand now that the bicycle won't cause problems if the person is most attracted to personality or if the partner's appearance is fluid.

I don't think it's as set in stone as that, but I understand where you're coming from. Even in straight relationships attraction will ebb and flow, I think that's quite natural for any type of relationship as it progresses and you experience various events in life. Illness, new ideas about looks, aging etc.

I think we need to challenge ourselves a bit on attraction and what it means to us and why. I wouldn't lose attraction to my partner as they age either or if they got severely ill. No one is static neither in looks nor insights.