this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2025
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The right person for me deserves better. (lemmy.ml)
submitted 12 hours ago by cm0002@lemmy.world to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
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[–] TheRealKuni@midwest.social 15 points 3 hours ago

The right person for me deserves better.

I’m sure you’re joking, at least at some level. But if you’re like me, you probably also believe it at some level.

It turns out this is, in some ways, a good mindset. Always keep in mind that your partner deserves better, and you’re driven to be better for them. Not because you aren’t enough, but because you can be your best when you learn to navigate the give-and-take that long-term relationships require. You’ll fuck up, but if you’re willing to be kind, empathetic, and most importantly apologetic, and willing to get up and try again when you fall, you’re already far ahead of plenty of people.

But if you start thinking you deserve better than your partner, you’re gonna have a bad time.

We’re all insecure at our core, but that means so is everyone else. The right person for you also thinks you deserve better. Build them up, and they’ll build you up in return.

(Sorry, I know it’s a shitpost.)

[–] UrPartnerInCrime@sh.itjust.works 15 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Imma be real guys, it can happen. My girlfriend, whos currently sleeping next to me, finally got frustrated enough with me not making a move to knock on my door one night and tell me her feelings. Been almost a year now. So like, it's not impossible.

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 4 hours ago

Does she have any friends for my door?

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

I've been recently suddenly smitten. Been awhiiiile. And of course she's my coworker. On a team of three. At my new job of only three months. So yay person of interest, I guess, but of course there are now 3,000 potential new issues/stressors.

[–] twice_hatch@midwest.social 2 points 3 hours ago

It's a dark forest out there

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Lmao me. Best part is even if I went out, the person I'm looking for is sitting in their room reading a book and wont be out where I am.

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 hours ago (3 children)

Library or bookstore, babeeeey

[–] Bahnd@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

Just any third place in general, they mostly died out during the last plague and are only starting to return to the world. If your looking for someone, go do interesting things in front of interesting people.

[–] Rawdogthatexe@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Libraries need bars. I've been to a bookstore with a bar inside, it's a good move.

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 hour ago

Oh fuck that's a great business model. Maybe one day I'll open a library/cafe/bar with nice music and atmosphere

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

I tried the library, but unfortunately my local is populated with people whom it would either be illegal and/or undesirable to date, it's mostly kids and olds (like, grandma/grandpa old. I'm an old but not that old, I'm looking for something in a decade-size 30s), or unfortunately houseless people (and while that in and of itself isn't necessarily a dealbreaker, it often comes with things that are in my experience, can't be dating addicts anymore for my own health, it is what it is.)

Bookstores maybe, and I've seen people in the store that I totally would love to get to know (who knows how it'd go y'know but I'm down for some coffee or something to determine compatibility beyond attraction yadda yadda), however it is my understanding that it is never appropriate to approach a woman in public and talk to her while she's just trying to go about her business shopping, or god forbid working, anywhere.

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

I mean, there's no cheat code to meeting people. It requires you to put yourself out there, and what better way to put yourself out there than to publicly enjoy things you enjoy?

Do things you're interested in, self express (have fun with clothes, pins, patches, whatever, they make a good conversation starter), notice other people self expressing. As far as approaching people goes, it's always safe to quickly compliment something somebody obviously put effort into, and then from there you can gauge whether they're interested in more of a conversation.

An example being if somebody has clearly crocheted their bag or something, you could say something like "that is a great bag, did you make it?/where did you get it?" Big rule when complimenting is ALWAYS be ready to let a conversation end where it starts. You're just throwing a ball into their court to see if they engage further than a "thank you!" You're just throwing out a line to see who bites, because nobody owes you their attention, but somebody who wants to give it may make it clear if you open the floor.

Opening yourself up to rejection is difficult and scary, but also just a necessary part of making connections.

[–] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 3 points 5 hours ago

You're worth it though, right? Not being sarcastic....

[–] stebo02@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

I occasionally do all of those things and have achieved nothing, so you're not missing out if that helps

[–] frigidaphelion@lemmy.world 4 points 5 hours ago

I had zero luck all the way up to when good things happened so just stick with it and try to stay moralized 👍

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 57 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

If it was meant to be she would fall through my ceiling

[–] burgersc12@mander.xyz 6 points 9 hours ago

If only there was a way to make connections on some type of forum... Too bad that's never gonna happen!

[–] Emi@ani.social 2 points 7 hours ago

Same, wanting someone to hangout but getting very anxious about just going outside.

[–] felykiosa@sh.itjust.works 5 points 9 hours ago

This one hit my kokoro

[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works -5 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

Meeting humans is intolerable, but my hope is that with AI technology advancing as rapidly as it is, soon I will be able to assemble the right robot for me...

[–] archonet@lemy.lol 16 points 11 hours ago (2 children)
[–] dingus@lemmy.world 1 points 21 minutes ago

Legalize robosexual marriage!!

[–] TheBrideWoreCrimson@sopuli.xyz 1 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

I was thinking of "Ex Machina."

[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

Yes, but even Skynet would probably like me better than the average woman does. Skynet > human woman > AM.

(I never know if explicitly saying that I'm not being serious is necessary on the internet or just ruins the joke, but here I'm going to ruin the joke.)

[–] RustyShackleford@literature.cafe 11 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

You had me with Meeting humans is intolerable, but lost me with the rest.

[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 4 points 8 hours ago

I've lost you? But we were meant to be together!