this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2025
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The Onion and other satire w/ layers

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redundancy, but not for its own sake

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[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 2 hours ago

It's tough competing with Joe Pesci.

[–] antlion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

The sun has many millions of modern worshippers. Every person sunbathing. Every farmer and gardener. Everyone with PV on their roof who loves checking the stats. You don’t need to personify something to pay it respect and gratitude. A moderate solar flare may remind some of its power, but so far in my lifetime the sun has been a merciful god, and I give many thanks.

For those sunscreen UV-phones: your blame of the sun is misplaced. It is the atmosphere of this planet who’s punishing us with sun burns for our disrespectful emissions.

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 hours ago (1 children)
[–] taladar@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 hour ago

Photovoltaics, solar panels.

[–] Coreidan@lemmy.world 0 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

Just make friends with Trump and then the whole world will line up to suck your dick.

If humans love anything is facism and racism.

[–] AceFuzzLord@lemm.ee 10 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

I don't know, but unlike God, you can pretty much see the sun most any day. So I think worshipping the thing you can see without needing any intervention is a better lifestyle.

All Praise The Sun! Praise The Sun!

[–] sylver_dragon@lemmy.world 6 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

You can see it. It makes all life on Earth possible. Its warm radiance drives away the darkness and cold of night. It doesn't judge you or take away its light based on some arbitrary rules set down by a guy in a funny hat. It's a damn sight better than most of the dieties we've made up over the centuries.

Praise Sol!

[–] Dindonmasker@sh.itjust.works 1 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

The sun is the reason for life on esrth. We call the earth mother so the sun is our father!

[–] ThePantser@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

Is the moon the weird uncle that is always peeping at us but we only catch them doing it at night?

[–] pyrflie@lemm.ee 7 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Have you tried turning off and back on again. I don't mean blocked service.

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 4 points 14 hours ago (1 children)
[–] pyrflie@lemm.ee 5 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Again not blocked service. I mean full reset.

It's like saying you turned off the monitors.

[–] sylver_dragon@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Unfortunately, the shutdown procedure takes about 5 billion years. Also, the entire operating system is kept in volatile storage. So, once it loses power, restarting it requires reloading all of the storage from scratch. This would mean an extended outage and may have some impact on users who rely on its services. The potential impact to revenue generating activities is considered too great to allow a reboot at this time. We can reevaluate again next millennium.

[–] pyrflie@lemm.ee 3 points 14 hours ago

Unfortunately worship is measured every 500 years or so. It's a real workshoping bitch.

This has become an IT, QA, and Marketing meeting. I'm out sick for two weeks.

[–] Squorlple@lemmy.world 7 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Stop giving people cancer?

[–] CubitOom@infosec.pub 10 points 15 hours ago

The sun works in mysterious ways.

[–] maniii@lemmy.world 2 points 13 hours ago

Just get an alien race to build a dyson sphere and supply everything with energy on demand to all earth based lifeforms.

[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 2 points 13 hours ago

Throw a flare our way to get our attention.

[–] ogmios@sh.itjust.works 1 points 14 hours ago