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Sun Unsure What It Has To Do To Get Humans To Worship It Again (theonion.com)

submitted 15 hours ago by can@sh.itjust.works to c/theonion@sh.itjust.works

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[–] sylver_dragon@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Unfortunately, the shutdown procedure takes about 5 billion years. Also, the entire operating system is kept in volatile storage. So, once it loses power, restarting it requires reloading all of the storage from scratch. This would mean an extended outage and may have some impact on users who rely on its services. The potential impact to revenue generating activities is considered too great to allow a reboot at this time. We can reevaluate again next millennium.

[–] pyrflie@lemm.ee 3 points 14 hours ago

Unfortunately worship is measured every 500 years or so. It's a real workshoping bitch.

This has become an IT, QA, and Marketing meeting. I'm out sick for two weeks.