this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2024
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Like everything that this goon touches, this neuralink shit is a farce. The leads need to be placed very specifically, then they need to not move with brain growth. They move, and fail, and then musk doctors get to open your head up again to reset them. This shit is never going to be viable. With muskrat involved it is certainly to be a grift.
But, this company synchron has it figured out. No placing leads, no open brain surgery. Outpatient install, and adaptive. Thing becomes part of the vein wall.
What we really need is for people to be way more distracted and absorbed into media at all times of the day than they already are AND for there to be no detectable way to know they are distracted to everyone around them. The frustration of being constantly ignored combined with the urge to constantly have information or entertainment streaming straight into your cortex will mean that everyone is even more isolated and lonely than they have ever been before and are therefore easier to radicalized! Can't wait for the new techno-pocalypse!
Headphones do all this already. No mind control is a nice little benefit too.
Yeah because headphone usage poses no ear health issues what so ever. Completely optimal solution
What are the ear health issues with headphones?
Too loud
If only there was some way you could make it less loud? Oh well
And how many people make it too loud anyway because they don't realize?
If people past the age of 9 don't realize that volume controls exist and that it's good for their hearing to use them, that's on them. And possibly their parents.
I don't think you've met enough humans yet.
I think a lot of people can realize how much is too much at once. Far less can recognize how much is too much over a long time period.
Idek how people can handle deep diving straight into max volume
Gotta finesse it a bit. Gradually go up, until you max it half way through a song you like and decide to restart it
You know that most modern devices have a volume control...?
Headphones are a much smaller threat to auditory health than cars. We should ban cars.
Contrary to headphones that streams music to my feet.
So louder = brain fry?
But when you don't pay the monthly fe, 24/7 Shitty flutes
When you DO pay: 24/7 mediocre flutes, with unskippable commercials.
Even if you wanted some proprietary tech installed in your body, it seems like such a terrible idea. What happens when the thing is obsolete? What happens if there is a bug? What happens when Elons team didn't consider some edge case or basic engineering principles? What is to prevent them from doing something unethical once it is installed?
Stay out of my brain, thank you very much.
But but ... it'll play music in your head! Don't you see the benefit of such marvellous innovation provided exclusively by Elon Musk?
I would be interested in seeing brain implant with fully open-source firmware that could be flashed securely (as in no wireless updates). I probably wouldn't use it but I would be more comfortable with supporting it for those with physical disabilities.
No think,
only consume.
We will welcome hackers!!
Heroes we will need but won't deserve.
Megacorps will stream constant ads directly to your brainhole & cause pain if you don't consume enough - even a rickroll will be a big improvement from the dystopian reality.
"Hey remember that weird time everyone saw an augmented reality hallucination of Max Headroom for like 10 seconds?"
Can we just not post about that man even in jest.
If it plays music, it will play adverts
Nice to see Musk having some real wholesome inspirations.
What's next, recreating Torment Nexus from the famous novel "Don't Create Torment Nexus"? Though Elon brain chips is already Torment Nexus for all the monkeys who lived and died in insane pain in the development process.
It's called Ohrwurm. Go cyberfuck yourself, smegma mine dwarf.
Yay, now you can pay for sponsorships in a form of schizophrenia. I'd rather have actual schizophrenia, than whatever this is.
Neuralink will not be a thing, stop trying to make it a thing!