Therevev

The problem is that "yourself" still comes out eventually. And sometimes it takes a long while to find "the one" because you kind of hid certain aspects from your partners for too long. This is generally why most of my longer-term relationships have failed. Too many "best faces forward" for too long, until one breaks that

I was mid 30s when I found the one that is "the one". We had our first date in our work clothes, and had a conversation that would sound insane to any observers. For the last 5 years, I've never felt the need to hold anything back or change the way I talk about things, and I dont think she does either. Because we still have insane conversations

To me, it's very zen. it's more about putting the situation in the perspective that you need to handle the situation for what it is and not focus on being upset at the situation or being upset at not having a solution. Not every scenario has an end that works out for you, If you even have any control over it.

I usually hear it said when someone is having difficulty with a problem they have no real control over. Sometimes you just have to let things go and deal with your own emotions on the situation (which nobody else can do for you), or remove yourself from the situation entirely.

Find a trade. If you're good at what you do, it really doesn't matter how wierd or fucked up you are. You can even get in full-on arguments with your boss that get forgotten about once everyone calms down.

As long-term career advice, I think this is helpful In finding something that doesn't drag you down. If you can't be yourself at work it's going to be far more taxing.

But I absolutely understand this is a luxury to be able to be in that position of being choosy about your employer.

You'll be far happier in an environment that enjoys you for being you, but you'll find a job quicker by saying what they want to hear

Somwhat related quote from my father in law about being a good worker:

"First year, they like you. Second year, they love you. Third year, they just start using you"

Idk. Im 40 and hurt myself on a bouncy slide not long ago.

My body defintely isnt in agreement with how young i feel.

Fair point. I am not.

It's definitely been a weird change. Reddit was comfortable, but it was because I'd figured out how to make my home there a decade ago. Lemmy isn't comfortable. I'm sure it will be fine, but it's just not what I'm used to.

It's a lot like when my favorite Mexican restaurant changed owners and everything was different. It's still a fine place (and the food might actually be better), but it isn't my comfort place anymore.

Same here. I mostly hung out in smaller, hobby subreddits. And the few I've found here are mostly dead. I really want to nerd-out with other people about shit nobody else cares about