Kitathalla

Question for the doctor, especially due to your location of work. Have you ever been approached for shadowing? How would you prefer to be asked?

I suppose it's possible. The amount of absorption is going to depend on what specifically is 'in there.' Most vitamins (for example) have been separated from their pre-eaten location/environment by the physical mastication, churning, and compression; and by chemical means by chelation agents, acid/enzyme digestion, or other molecules that break apart lipid blobs and such; and even more importantly, are done in areas designed for absorption with lots of villi to give a million times the surface area. Alcohol, the oft-given example of a substance absorbed by the rear part of your gastric tube, is a fairly 'ready to be absorbed' compound. Suppositories are also similarly in a state that makes their active agents easily absorbed.

A whole bananal probably is going to be absorbed like a rock through a 5mm sieve. The bacteria in the rectum might start the process, breaking down the cells and matrix of the banana into readily absorbed compounds, but if you've ever seen an organic object like an apple or banana rot outside somewhere, it is a very slow process. You'll be much more likely to suffer some form of infection/sepsis from the bloom of bacteria (or the smaller chance of a fungal infection) long before enough of the banana is absorbed.

All of this is even more true if the OP was shoving them still in their skins in. The bananal skin will definitely be a very slow degradation, and absorb like an intelligent thought into the president elect.

2 people trying to stab you, not greater than 1

From the Hollywoo rule of attackering protagonists, more attackers mean more ways to foil them by misdirection and mutual banging each other, therefore 2>1.

I'll do you better, and someone out there may know it's me.

I once was in a river,

downstream from many givers,

and then began to shiver...

I felt a slide go past my liver.

There I was alone;

the house far, and across stone;

and my south began to groan;

from my lips I droned, "oh no."

I tried to climb the rise,`

while tightly clamping thighs,

but as I soon surmised,

I couldn't hold the surprise.

All the river floaters watched,

as my privacy I botched,

there right upon the stony swatch,

what horror flowed right from my crotch.

Worst experience of my shitting life was when I didn't defecate prior to the monthly jog. Luckily I could squeeze through the fence of the golf club I was near, and it was early enough nobody was around to 'report' me, AND they had the course's bathroom door unlocked. Now I just exercise at home where there's a bathroom within safe jumping distance.

That's the best answer.

I mean, I get it, but this is the same logic that is sometimes used for school shootings. It's abhorrent to ignore a large increase compared to other places just because it is still a small chance, and therefore do nothing.

I have to think a bullet brick would be much more painful than a bullet point. I'm also curious if it would be more of a cannon than a gun, and thus safer to have in the hands of 'the people' because it wouldn't really be a thing you could carry around on a whim. Would people put it in those little red wagons and walk it like a dog in a movie montage?

We'll all be your friend here. We just have to avoid all things that could potentially cause strife, because we are on the .world server, after all. No real discussions, no delving into topics that unnerve cowardly mods. Everything is surface level and calm, just like any casual... friendship... without feeling....

You took the blue pill already, didn't you?

Do you have to have the person in line-of-sight? Is awareness of them enough? Do they need to hear you? Do they need to see you? The "on command" bit is what makes me think they need to be able to be given a command, so at the very least have a speaker nearby. It's a great bluff though. Who, after all, would actually question it once you've made them go several times.

The diarrhoea bit is an idea though. Can you make them poop in different ways? If you can make them have loose, watery stools could you also go the other direction and make them shit bricks? Take 100 men, make them shit bricks, and now you have an industry of adamantium-strength building material. Scale it up as business grows. The world would design around the piddling side effect that the hardest material in the universe is fecal matter. Masks with jasmine would become standard. People would wear skintight bodysuits that are easily removed and recycled in the intimate parts of their homes/offices that are made from non fecal material. Cleanliness would take over the world by necessity. You could be the start of a beautiful, shit-built world...

It's our duty!