Cranakis

Thank you. I needed to hear that.

considered myself straight most of my life

I don't have advice but I relate to you here. I'm also a man and have only come to terms with my bisexuality in the last 3 years or so, but I'm probably older than you. I wonder what the future will hold for me. I'm married so that complicates things, and most of my friends think of me as straight, along with all of my family. I wouldn't mind them knowing at this point but I just haven't had a reason to tell them. It would cause some of them stress and I'd just rather not if I don't have to.

longing for someone to hold me

Here I relate to the specifics of your need/desire but not that desire exactly. I do like being held. To my wife's credit I feel mostly satisfied there. I feel a strong need to be desired though, suddenly along with all of this, and I feel dissatisfied there. I want to be wanted badly (sexually). An experience with a gay man that never turned sexual at all is at the start of that, for me, just a year or so ago.

I agree with others here that we are all pretty unique, and I extend that to everyone, everywhere. Good for you for working to understand yourself better.

I've really been in a tail spin over it. It is fucking bad.

They believe they need to "save" the rest of us from ourselves. Their (his) world view (2 people from the presidency) is pure hubris. Johnson thinks he knows better than everyone else. He's "ordained by god." Its revolting.

“The Bible is very clear that God is the one that raises up those in authority,” he said. “He raised up each of you, all of us. And I believe that God has ordained and allowed each one of us to be brought here for this specific moment.” -Johnson when he accepted the Speakership.

Yes. He's a former ADF lawyer, proper Christian nutjob. They say things like this. They believe this.