Gaming

I bought a steam deck. Its the best thing if you don't have lots of time as you can pause and turn it off and pick up where you left off later. Obviously that won't work for online games great for project zomboid though. YMMV

Try some chill single player games, ones that focus on a great story with no real difficulty. That helped a lot for me when I had a similar feeling.

Firewatch, the Life us Strange games, Road 96, Unravel, Superliminal to name a few.

Nothing makes me enjoy games like moderation. But moderation isn't just how often you choose to play - it's also how much you're expected to play.

I'm going to discuss both, because I think people underestimate personal moderation. But I suspect gameplay moderation is your struggle.

Personal moderation:

Games mimic psychological fulfilment (problem-solving, self-actualisation, etc). But it's not in a lasting way, they're just more attainable.

It's like buying a chocolate bar vs cooking yourself a roast meal. It's easier, it's pleasant, and there's nothing wrong with enjoying it - but if it's the only thing I'm doing, and I never put in the work for something more satisfying, I feel unsatisfied - even emotionally 'sick' (bored, restless, ennui). When they are a treat at the end of a day, they feel great. But when they are my day, I struggle to enjoy them.

This is the trap that often catches directionless people (eg: depressed, NEET, lonely). They don't play games for games, they play them to avoid the anxiety or stress of cooking a roast meal. They eat chocolate until they feel sick, and then feel too sick to cook.

Gameplay moderation:

Games are designed for people who have time to burn. Teenagers, kids, some young adults. When you were younger, you could afford to burn that time, and it felt good, because each session meant you felt that hit of dopamine for problem-solving, achievement, and progression.

But now, you can't. You're an adult, you don't have that time. And yet games aren't being designed for you anymore, but the new kids and teens. They brag about dozens or even hundreds of hours of playtime, and bloat their content with grind. (if anything, the latter has gotten even worse.)

You only have an hour to play a game, and after that hour, there's no feeling of progression or advancement - the game expects you to give it more time than that. And without the feeling of progression and advancement, games don't feel as engaging.

That is why they feel like chores, like jobs; it's why you choose things that give immediate feedback like the internet. Games are asking you to put in too much time and then not giving you enough back.

Portal 2 is considered a masterful game at five hours long, because each hour is rewarding. Is Destiny? Is Halo? Froza?

If this is your concern, my suggestion would be to step back from the bigger scale games that want to monopolise time, and embrace smaller games from indie devs.

You'll get far more variety, they tend to be much denser. They're also cheap enough that it's worth it to try a bunch of things you might not have tried if they were AAA.

If somebody says a game is 'only 6 hours of gameplay', see that as a positive, not a negative. It probably means each hour is going to mean something.

Have you considered playing a shorter singleplayer game? I find I get fatigued by how long some games can go on for whether it's multiplayer like The Elder Scrolls Online or a sandbox game like Red Dead Redemption.

Maybe you could try something like GRIS? It's a relaxing game with a neat art style that that only takes about 3 hours to beat.

Contrary opinion - it's OK to give up hobbies you don't enjoy any more.

Gaming was an important part of your life at one point. You remember it fondly because currently you are lacking something in your life, so you're thinking - I used to enjoy gaming so I should enjoy it again.

Doesn't work like that - people go through phases. Find what you enjoy now. Yes, maybe it's gaming again. Maybe its something else - hiking, fixing motorcycles, partying ... who knows. Experiment with activities until you find something that will make you burn again!

I wouldn't recommend this with the sole reason being to get back into gaming. I started taking THC gummies and it is like being a kid again playing video games.

For me after some time away from PC gaming, getting a steam deck was one thing that got me back into it. The other thing though was definitely selecting relatively short games. I played a lot of open-ended games that I could never finish like rimworld or crusader kings, it was nice to get back into games with a beginning middle and end. And in the same vein it means I've been playing stuff that I was interested in playing back in the 2010s but didn't really have the time/money/hardware for

If you're depressed, sometimes you lose interest in your hobbies. You might want to look into seeing someone.

I will say, you seem a bit worried about no longer considering yourself a gamer, like this burnout has led to a crisis of identity. You are MORE than your hobbies. Gamer is a temporary state based on what you are doing. It is okay not to be one. You're still you.

The Forgotten City is the one that restored my hope in gaming.

I feel you man. Are you sure you’re nostalgic about gaming itself and not about a time when you were carefree? Maybe you just need to find back your balance. I’m an anxious person and the worst episode I’ve had lasted roughly a year. Sick leave and everything. No interest for gaming even longer than that. Worked on myself, picked up the pieces and the will to game came back slowly but surely. What I’m saying is maybe you need some healing before the next adventure?

Have you played Outer Wilds by chance? I agree with many that it's probably one of the best games ever made, and I can't think of any game that better encapsulates what games should be capable of. It captures the magical potential of exploration and discovery like nothing else I've ever played. So many cool ideas waiting for you to figure out, and the process is just so fun.

Along those lines, I've just been growing fonder of smaller, indie-style games, which had never been my preference before now. Games like Gris, Little Nightmares, Hades (if you consider that "smaller"), Deliver Us the Moon have left a really positive impression. Many of them are imperfect, but I feel like there's a lot of love tangible in those experiences. Maybe I'm just imagining that, but they lack the bloat that has disillusioned me with a lot of the bigger games lately, and they feel more purposeful in general.

If you haven't, look through some lists of best indie games and see if anything jumps out at ya.

I just homebrewed my Wii and have been having a blast playing GameCube and Wii games I never had but always wanted to try.

Naruto Clash of Ninja 4 for example is a PHENOMENAL game that I had never even heard of before two days ago

FPS’s seemed boring, online games couldn’t keep my attention long enough to get through a match, and eventually I’d just leave a game on the pause menu while I messed around mindlessly on my phone.

My partner does this.

One, you might have ADHD. I can't say, but you could look into it.

Secondly, you need to have some time to let your brain rest. When you bounce between tasks like that, you're never actually not doing something. People think of doomscrolling as taking a break, but really you're replacing your intended task with another task and there isn't a time where you do no task.

Super Mario Odyssey if you haven't already played it.

Really reignited that spark.

Also if you enjoyed BotW, Tears of the Kingdom is a fantastic sequel.

Feeling the same, even tho my life hasn't been nearly as stressful as yours. Games, especially new single player games with thousands of hours of content just aren't fun for me anymore, even tho I loved Skyrim, Fallout, Dragon Age and Witcher. But I still find a lot of fun playing games with friends.

Especially DayZ. It's like, really just taking a long walk with friends in the forest, because that's what the game is lol. Strolling arounds in Cherno, sitting together at the campfire and talking about our days, sometimes meeting with strangers and sharing that experience (or getting into a stressful firefight 😅). These are really the best experiences I had with gaming to this day.

For me it was Crusader Kings 2. I started playing it after CK3 came out. It was free and seemed interesting, and it took me a while to get used to such a game, but it was fun when I did get used to it all. It's even more fun with all the DLCs and there's plenty of mods to try out. I usually play a single campaign for about an hour or two a day over a week or more which helps me de-stress. It might not be the answer you're looking for, but maybe you can try some games like it where you don't need to be active all the time, or where you can just turn your mind off and kill a few hours.

What did/do you play games for? Think about the moments you enjoyed the most and why. Just to name a few motivations: are you looking to get a sense of improvement and complete challenges, are you looking to live a fantasy, exploration, get a story via a unique medium, flex creativity or be a part of a community. I find myself having different reasons to want to play depending on my mood.

Once you find your reason, you can start searching for what satisfies that. I strongly suggest you avoid triple a titles and focus mainly on indie.

You mention botw resparking things, from what I hear that game really appeals to those who want to express creativity and those who like exploration. I can't help much with the creativity (not really what I like) but for exploration I can recommend hollowknight (a metroidvania that I lost myself in for days) or outerwilds (a space sim with narrative based mystery and light puzzle elements, I highly recommend you go in as blind as possible)

I have a very similar relationship with gaming. A similar break for college and a similar resurgence with BotW followed by a similar falling out because of kids haha.

I’ll be honest, it doesn’t feel the same anymore. I don’t think it ever wil again. But I’ll share the things that have come close to getting that feeling back.

1. Online game night with friends - this puts me mentally back in the 90’s staying up late and gaming with friends. It’s more about the company and conversations than the game itself. I try to do this at least once a week.

2. Gaming with my son - he’s 6 and we’ve been able to find a ton of games we love playing together, most notably Nintendo games. He loves all things Mario. We also run through games like Hot Wheels Unleashed, Luigi’s Mansion 3, Lego 2K Drive. Anything with a kid friendly co-op campaign has been fun.

3. Allowing yourself to mentally move on from games once you’re not having fun - I used to have this issue with a mental backlog or feel badly for buying a game and then not beating it. Not sure if you have the same issue. But lately I’ve tried not to put too much pressure on myself to beat a game. If I’m not having fun I move on. Life is too short and game time is too precious to waste it on a game I’m not loving.

Hope this helps. Like I said, I don’t think it’ll ever feel the same, but this has helped it come close for me.

The latest Zelda, Tears of the Kingdom, completely reignited my gaming passion. This game is incredible if you enjoy rich world building, exploration and adventure, and puzzle solving.

I do two basic things when I get on a rut. I replay a favorite RPG with mods and a very specific roleplaying theme. For example I played fallout 4, console commanded myself a million caps, high charisma, and liw intelligence. I played through as a rich idiot. The other thing I do is find a game way outside my normal style and see if I can figure out the appeal that it has to other people.

This does sound like something beyond gaming; you do have a lot on your plate like you said.

At different points in my life my gaming time also changed, depending on what my priorities are.

Eventually the want to game comes back and I'll spend a weekend or two on something fun.

It does sound like you're burnt out in general, and I'm not sure more gaming might help. I think the first thing to do is to find a way to establish some "me" time, like a solid block of an hour or two where you can do something for yourself. Doesn't have to be gaming, but it has to be for you. Once you can get that going you can work gaming into it, or some other hobby.

Honestly my current jump back into gaming was playing Breath of the Wild on my Switch while on deployment. I did have a hiatus a few years back which was broken by my attempt at beating Bloodborne (wholly unsuccessful, btw, it's not really my speed but I enjoyed the heck out of it). My go-to game for decompressing is Stardew Valley. I just love being able to jump in and maybe harvest some crops, maybe explore the mines, maybe go interact with the villagers even.

Another tactic of mine when I'm in a funk is to pick up an older rpg (snes or ps1 preferred) and start working on it.

Taking breaks and work on hobby’s and stop playing online games for good. I have a pretty bad anger problem so online games where just suffering.

For me, I just kind of faded away from gaming, focusing on life and other hobbies.

I finally saw that god of war and horizon zero dawn were ported to steam, played the fuck out of them both, and jumped on spider-man as it got ported as well.

From there I ended up getting a PS5 to play the sequels of those three and I haven’t looked back. It has been SO fun to get back into it

The Star Wars Jedi game was also another game that I had a blast with as I got back into it. Played the first on pc and the second on ps. Excellent games without question

PlayStation has just been fucking killing it in the story driven gameplay the last few years especially

During the pandemic, I tried Super Metroid for the first time ever. I just wanted to play a little bit of it to get a feel for it. It caught me hook, line, and sinker. If you missed out and are at all into retro gaming, can't recommend it highly enough.

I wouldn't sweat it too much. Sounds to me like you've found peace in reading through tough times. Maybe that's your new gaming. I personally bounce between things. Read for periods of time, then game, then watch movies/TV. Right now my infatuation is with the new Final Fantasy as I've been wanting a narrative driven game, and it's satiating that craving so far. After I beat this game, I'm going into patient gamer mode for a while, and picking up my dormant guitar that's sat for 10 years. I love music as well, so I want to up my game there and start to learn from scratch. If games fall by the wayside while I explore guitar then it's okay, I will find my way back to them when something strikes my interest. Until then we must follow our urges and let them go where they may.

I can't speak to being a step parent, I'm single and don't desire a relationship right now so I have lots of free time. I just realized over the years that I also don't want to look back and have all my time spent on one hobby that doesn't leave much to show for.

I've been playing Destiny nearly 100% of my gaming time for the last like 9 years. I finally decided to try other games again after a particular slow and uninteresting season. I decided to go with Mass Effect Trilogy. I loved it so much after I beat it I immediately started a new character of the opposite gender. After finishing that run I've moved on to Andromeda.

As a huge fan of space and scifi. I'm looking forward to Starfield. Mass Effect gave me that magic and I'm super excited to see all these worlds I've been missing out on.

I have went through a similiar phase a few years ago after starting university and moving to a different city. A few years later I had the opportunity to get me some nice computer for very little money which brought me back into gaming but I honestly dont remember which game I played first.

In times like those, I enjoy a 2D retro-style indie platformer or metroidvania. There are so many available, they're usually cheap yet made with heart, and they scratch the itch to recapture a simpler era.

I was also in a lull for a while, I don't remember exactly why I stopped, but someone recommended hypnospace outlaw to me because it had a heavy focus on exploration and following clues, and I gotta say it was a good recommendation. Something about how earnestly and lovingly it represented the turn of the millennium internet and the transition from web 1.0 to 2.0 really spoke to me, it was like digging through a time capsule, almost.

@Evolone I went back to a #WoW 3.3.5a private server I used to play on when I was young and couldn't afford the monthly fee. The community over there is super laid back because everyone knows there will never be new content. I'm really enjoying my time there, despite only having a few hours per week to spare.

So, go back to your roots. Play a game you used to play a lot.

I play a lot less cause of depression and isolation so games I mainly play on my own are simple enough for me to play when my mind is fried and that I can quickly play little and come back no problem like do a level of Miitopia or like 1 or 2 races in Mario Kart.

I also feel like I need to get away from gaming right now but sadly I am stuck with lack of support from family and the mental health system.

What helps me the most is playing multiplayer locally mainly to deal with isolation and cause my connection is crap and i don't want to pay subscriptions for what used to be free.

To answer your question what games brought back i don't really have that but some games that grabbed onto me recent years are usually odd and silly games like Miitopia(has a demo on switch(Nintendo exclusive)), Bug Fables, Bugsnax, Cat Quest 2(has a demo on switch), What the Golf, Wandersong.

Check out the System Shock remake if you have a gaming PC. I recommend Dying Light as well; the parkour traversal and zombie physics are unmatched.

'Return of the Obra Dinn' is another favorite of mine.

Games that hold your hand and provide waypoints to every objective (i.e. built-in walkthrough syndrome) strip the joy for me personally.

Lots of great recommendations here. For me, I've definitely found that shorter and more casual games have really helped me get back into it. Challenging single player games or competitive multiplayer games can just seem like too much for me after a stressful day or when I'm in a mood.

I have fun with idle games, automation games, visual novels, and small indie games. I find after playing one of those for a bit I feel ready to tackle something more challenging.

I started playing short games only (ideally 20, max 40 hours), mainly indie games. They're tighter and usually go straight to the point. They often have one good idea and reiterate on it until they said all they had to say and don't overstay their welcome. Also, replaying old games is always nice. I've replayed OG Fallout recently and had a blast, currently replaying New Vegas (which goes against my short games rule, but I also know it well enough to not waste time doing things).

Trying new genres and emulating old games is what I do. I picked up Fallen London lately during my down time and I'm emulating some PS1 RPGs I never beat growing up.

I think the reality is, we won't ever be able to capture the nostalgia. Sometimes I just don't have the brain for a story, or the energy for skill checks, and sometimes I just can't game at all. I try to not pressure myself too much during the dips in interest, it seems to make me more depressed.

Allowing myself to float from game to game as my mood wills it has been important to not losing my ability to play to depression and exhaustion.

I definitely don't play the same games the same way I did before, but there is a lot of me that's changed over the years!

If you’re up for a challenge and an adventure my recommendation would be Elden Ring. It gave me that exact feeling you’re describing.