Asklemmy

43963 readers

1106 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
!lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

which one do you prefer? having kids or no kids? and why?? (lemmy.world)

submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by hungrythirstyhorny@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

149 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] viking@infosec.pub 22 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

I think that deciding not to have kids is not a selfish act. Having kids just to have a fallback when old and frail on the other hand side is very much so.

[–] imaqtpie@sh.itjust.works 5 points 5 months ago

I agree, I don't think not having kids has anything to do with being selfish.

But I guess what they meant to say is just that having kids is hard. A lot of times, people become more selfless and less focused on their own wants and needs after they become parents.

Of course, some people don't actually become more selfless or responsible, and instead they just become bad, narcissistic parents. But the choice to have kids is associated with the choice to be a responsible adult and work for the benefit of others, at least in theory.

[–] oxjox@lemmy.ml 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

That argument makes sense. Though I see it more from choosing to prioritize yourself and own self interests over having children and sharing a life with them as selfish too. I guess we're all selfish one way or another.

[–] viking@infosec.pub 3 points 5 months ago

Right, I get what you mean, and I agree. No matter how you put it, nothing is ever entirely selfless.