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What's the best wax-on-wax-off-style advice you've heard that you can attest as being helpful in certain situations? (lemm.ee)

submitted 6 months ago by shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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[–] otacon239@feddit.de 34 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Not sure if this applies, but “You can never love someone else until you love yourself” was a lesson my dad taught me from a very young age.

If you don’t like yourself, you’ll almost inevitably end up with someone who is taking advantage because you won’t be able to stand up for yourself and you won’t speak up when they hurt you.

There are the very rare exceptions, but they are the ones who help you help yourself. Someone who truly helps you will not shower you with gifts or compliments, but rather will help you recognize and change what you don’t like about yourself. In other words, “Only a true friend would be that truly honest.”

[–] odin@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago

“If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?” -RuPaul

[–] bloubz@lemmygrad.ml 7 points 6 months ago

Well there are different love languages and not everybody has it in themself to being able to help you change yourself.

Also I think someone insecure about themself would not necessarily be the one being oppressed, I guess they can also end up being toxic.

But I agree with you generally

[–] Snowpix@lemmy.ca 1 points 6 months ago

Reminds me of a verse from Social Distortion's "I Was Wrong":

"And I think about my loves, well I've had a few

Well, I'm sorry that I hurt them, did I hurt you too?

I took what I wanted, put my heart on the shelf

But how can you love when you don't love yourself?"