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Why do people keep asking where I'm from? (lemmy.ca)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by Shampoo_Bottle@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Up until I started working, I didn't really encounter that question. When I did start working, people started asking me that question.

Them: Where are you from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Where are your grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Ok, where are your great grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

It's irritating sometimes. I just want to exist, do my job and go home, like anyone else. Once is ok, twice is odd, three times is weird, and the fourth time is a pattern.

The only accent that I might have would probably be from Newfoundland, Canada, as I grew up with a lot of people from there. I also talk too fast sometimes.

Have you had similar experiences, and if so, how did you handle it? Can fast speech patterns cause this? Why do random people care so much?

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[–] knfrmity@lemmygrad.ml 3 points 10 months ago

I notice this a lot in Canada and the US. I think it's a weird internalization of the fact that these countries are made up of colonizers and people the colonizers brought in to do their dirty work for them.

Let me preface this by saying I'm white, and I lived in pretty much the same place until I was about 20. Most of my friends and acquaintances were also white and also born and raised in the area. My take on this is based on that lived experience. I am very aware that this question can take on very dark racist tones depending on the context.

"Where are you from" in a lot of cases doesn't mean "you look different or you talk different," it means "where did your ancestors come from"? When people ask, or volunteer this information, they're talking about that family history. This is how you get people from Alberta with four generations of family history in Alberta claiming that they're "a quarter German, a quarter Italian, an eighth Irish, and an eighth English", and that's the type of answer they expect when they ask a white or white-passing person this question.