Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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Sorry but I'm gonna focus on the bigger stuff:
Learn to listen to yourself, especially during the social transition. People whom you respect will try to convince you otherwise and the more you listen to them the longer you'll remain dead.
And also that we as a people with a shared experience provide a lot of value for society due to our hard earned experience. Sometimes I feel there's this silly debate going on, as if there's some kind of problem. But truthfully we can show everyone what self acceptance looks like, and that's important for everyone.
Fetish fashion stores are a good place to start with trying on female clothing. It's an accepting atmosphere and the employees are likely to support and help you with love. Wearing something sexy is incredibly empowering as a woman.
Hopefully you can then work up the guts to visit a makeup store and ask for advice. More expensive stores like Chanel will be more private and professional and have someone attend to you personally. You can take a friend with you. And be prepared to put down good money for some basics. But it's worth it. Get some close to natural looking eye shadow, mascara and lip stick, so you don't have to be so precise at first. Use day light and check out a few YouTube videos. The first few times you'll put more mascara on your nose and in your eyeballs than on your lashes.
Get your ears pierced at a proper piercing studio or jeweler that has piercing equipment. Can't go wrong there!
Get a large long mirror. Try different ways of walking in front of it.
Also at least for me the first medical step was hair removal. And from the hair lady I heard it's quite typical to start there, often without a diagnosis. At least where I live you don't need a diagnosis to get healthcare coverage. Like sure the whole process without blockers takes like 30 sessions, but even just a single session will feel so much better because shaving is easier and faster. So if you're poor and have no coverage it might still be worth the 100 euro for one session. Also for the pain I recommend praying in Latin.
Some smaller stuff: Use micellair water with those pads to clean your face twice a day. In the morning always put on spf facial cream after to keep it moisturized and protect from the sun. Always. And you can get another cream for at night. That way your skin will be clearer and it's important for makeup, because without it it'll be bumpy for some reason.
Get some fancy hair products. For example at a good hair salon. Especially if you have curly hair. Say it costs you 100 euro, ja it's expensive but it'll last you a year so basically you're paying like 8 euro a month for nice hair. Look up the curly girl method. Only wash it when it's genuinely dirty or if it doesn't listen to you any more, so once a week or less.