Asklemmy

If I had 1 million in hand-

I am willing to bet the dealership could get me in and out pretty quickly!

Likewise, I have a friend selling a house. I am quite certain we can make a bill of sale in an hour.

But- since those options are off-limits. Honestly- there really aren't many options.

Since, its cash-in-hand, that likely means online transactions are against the rules.

SO- the best course of action would be to visit a store with a lot of expensive goodies. In my case, walmart is the best local option. Suppose I could buy out all of the TVs, game systems, etc. At least those would have the best resale value.

It's just after noon and where I live, shops are open 365 days a year. The nearest IKEA is about a 30 min drive from here, I'll just ask the kitchen designer to print me a bill for 1.800 ovens, pay, then return everything within the 30 day free returns window.

Alternatively I would call my bank on the way and buy bearer bonds, traveler cheques, gold bars or whatever else, if they can issue them in time.

Stocks and bonds

I mean, if I get that money via my bank app, just gonna buy some stocks and bonds with it, wait 60 minutes and cash them all in after. I get to keep the money after taxes are deducted, and then might as well get my life in order and start travelling with my newfound financial freedom.

If I can't think of something better, I would donate to my university's foundation and earmark it for myself, or at least my department.

Or, I would just donate it to charity.

Or, pay off all my debts and donate to charity.

8pm here. I'd buy a house using some house buying mobile app. I'd probably sell it afterwards when the time is right and add the money to my investments.

Probably a crap load of music studio gear then donate to one or more schools in my neighborhood

I'd buy a good FPV drone, a Hurdy Gurdy and a nice office chair. My current one sucks.

Yeah, that's it.

I live in Las Vegas. I’m about in the middle of town and it’s 2200. There’s a pawn shop about 20 minutes away from me that’s open until 0100 every night. They’re a large normal pawn shop but specialize in jewelry and gold. I’d buy all of the precious metals, collector coins, and valuable jewelry. I’d sell the collector coins the next day to a different pawn shop that specializes in collector coins, the precious metals to the gold and silver pawn shop, and the jewelry to a third pawn shop. I’d probably walk away with less than a quarter of the original million and doubt I could spend it all before it vanished but 100-200 k in less than 24 hours is pretty damn good!

Gold, house, stonks.

A million dollars in bitcoin, I'd walk away with a cool $100 after selling it all.

In truth, being in a central Florida town at 7 in the morning, I'd go on a shopping spree at some of the bigger box stores and stock up on electronics and building supplies, before I blew the rest on tools.

does donation count? There are a few nonprofits in my area that Id probably give it too. Other than that wipe my mortgage and student debt, buy a new car, and a couple of suits probably. Man being an adult is boring.

I'd immediately spend my actual, IRL money in my bank account on an Uber to the nearest bank machine and shove as much of the cash in there as possible.

I would prepare myself to take a BIG loss.

I think I would go on Amazon or eBay and order a bunch of new or slightly-used laptops. Then I would spend the next few months selling them at bargain prices. I would never get the whole million back, but I'd make some damn good money.

Somebody smarter than me might buy something that will gain value over time instead of losing it, but hey, I only have an hour so this is the best plan I could come up with!

Disappear as in physically disappear? I wouldn't spend that "money" knowing that I will be sued.

Disappear as in I don't get to spend that money? Buy my mother's phone with 1 million and let her use the phone anyway.

Assuming stuff was still open, I'd go to the bank and deposit it immediately.

Afterward I would pay off every debt I have online.

After that? Pay off my sister's car and my girlfriend's college debt. Then probably rent as far in advance as possible.

I honestly wouldn't have much time after doing that so I would maybe do an online grocery order to stock up and then seriously make a random DoorDasher's day.

• Whelp, It's still just barely afternoon for me, so I'd gotta get to the bank as fast as possible to get my card straightened out so I can go online and order a bunch of things like art commissions from digital artists I like and then go onto other sites like Etsy or eBay to get things like a couple different knock-off pokemon plushies (looking at you, grafaiai).

• Then find DVD/Blu-ray sets for the cartoons I really like. Shows like Ahhh! Real Monsters or Code Lyoko. Whatever I could think of in the moment because I'd be too busy freaking out in excitement.

• Probably go to some place like a thrift store and buy some clothes for my stuffed rabbit and bear since I think they would look lovely in some nice clothes (even if they are baby clothes).

• After all that is purchased, I wouldn't know what to do, so probably just spend it on games on Steam or donating to groups like the people behind LibreOffice or Krita. Just giving a little towards the development of open source products I like in order to thank them for their product.

Edit:

I would only deposit a small amount into the bank so that way I would be able to use my card to buy all of these items online. I'd assume the money isn't directly deposited into my bank account, so I'd need to manually do it.

Thankfully I live close enough it'd only take less than 10 minutes to get in. Getting an appointment, might be an issue, so I might have to scrap all of the online shopping plans and just go to the game store I like and just buy a ton of old games and a pro controller for my switch and if they have it, another switch and a copy of pokemon scarlet so I can complete the pokedex on my violet save by either modding the switch or starting 2 new saves and doing LAN trading.

Considering I won't be able to actually get it into the bank account on time because of KYC, the best thing I can do is to purchase the closest convenience store that is next to my house - I don't think the dude will reject a transaction in cash