this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
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Please don't ask why I need this.

It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.

It has to be something I can easily find.

EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:

  • I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.

  • I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.

  • I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.

  • I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).

  • Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.

  • If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.

Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.

(page 8) 50 comments
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[–] tinwhiskers@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago

If you make it to wherever you're going, please let us know the story!

[–] MicrosoftSam@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)
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[–] Daftman@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Could you give us an update after your.... endeavours... how it went?

[–] Xathonn@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago
[–] ergifruit@lemmygrad.ml 5 points 1 year ago

as someone with IBS, cold/frozen liquids are the way to go... pun fully intended. it might be a bit difficult to keep things cool, but frozen sports drinks and the like are good for keeping you going. it's really unhealthy, and i absolutely can't recommend it, but it should work. you get a lot of your water intake from food, too, so if it's not getting any of that, the water you ingest from liquids/frozen liquids is gonna get sucked up by your large intestine and, in theory, you'll need the toilet less. good luck with, uh. your thing.

[–] super_user_do@feddit.it 5 points 1 year ago

Me surviving 1week without pooping

[–] pythonoob@programming.dev 5 points 1 year ago

Just use the MRE's you've no doubt been issued for beast week and stop complaining. Also hide your phone trainee, the MTI's are coming.

[–] Sleo@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 year ago

This sounds like you're on the hajj and don't want to use the crappy bathrooms and wait till you're in the hotel to poop. I would say drink lots of water, have some nuts and dates, drink some of the juices, stay away from rice and meat dishes. Enjoy the experience while you're there!

[–] bloubz@lemmygrad.ml 5 points 1 year ago

Well... just don't eat. You don't need to eat for 3 days to survive during that time

[–] leraje@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

Are you being human trafficked?

[–] bahnburner@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Breast milk has very few undigestible solids. Just saying.

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[–] squirrel_bear@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 year ago

OP, there's help available if you have OCD.

[–] evader_fateful@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It’s been 6 days since the original post. OP was 3 days out from the poopless leg of his trip. OP, I hope everything went according to plan!

Please update when back!

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[–] AzuleBlade@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago

Just wanted to say I was here for this.

[–] Bayblade@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] Wander@yiffit.net 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do you need energy? So there's something called the pineapple diet (please ask your doctor first) where you eat pineapple for three days to lose weight. Biggest problem here is the spam, so I guess you'd have to use some sort of food that can be rehydrated like soylent.

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[–] MinFapper@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

Soylent?

Should be available at most grocery stores

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[–] Juliie@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Avoid fiber like a plague, already

So no to popular fruits and vegetables, no carrots, beets, strawberry, apples

Hmm but also it would be good to actually poop last day before hike so maybe take some pills for that day before for a huge splasshh bbbrrrr

When you return expect to give birth to a shitman

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