Asklemmy

43940 readers

977 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
!lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

123

Do lesbians have a concept of Top and Bottom? (lemmy.world)

submitted 4 weeks ago by stoicmaverick@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

71 comments fedilink hide all child comments

It's been a long ol time since I've known any lesbians well enough to ask such things, but I followed my brain down a weird line of inquiry, and got to wondering about the current state of the art for the gay gals. I guess I had always assumed it was similar to the dynamics of a gay guy relationship, but then I realized that since men have both an input and an output, they can choose, but it's mechanically a bit different for cis women. Is there any relationship between that, and the slightly more masculine versus feminine flavors? Asking for a friend, who is me. I want to know. Thanks.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] Xyre@lemmus.org 8 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

I've always heard them referred to as starfish

[–] ChexMax@lemmy.world 8 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

I think the difference is that starfish just lie there, spread out, not really participating, and a pillow princess participates with words and moans, and their hands are roaming, and they're I think usually good receivers they just don't get on top and take a turn at the work part. They do motivate their partner to continue pleasing them though.

[–] stoicmaverick@lemmy.world 5 points 4 weeks ago

Sounds like everyone I know at work.

[–] macgyver@federation.red 5 points 4 weeks ago

That’s fair, but I learned the term from a bi girl so makes sense