News
Welcome to the News community!
Rules:
1. Be civil
Attack the argument, not the person. No racism/sexism/bigotry. Good faith argumentation only. This includes accusing another user of being a bot or paid actor. Trolling is uncivil and is grounds for removal and/or a community ban. Do not respond to rule-breaking content; report it and move on.
2. All posts should contain a source (url) that is as reliable and unbiased as possible and must only contain one link.
Obvious right or left wing sources will be removed at the mods discretion. We have an actively updated blocklist, which you can see here: https://lemmy.world/post/2246130 if you feel like any website is missing, contact the mods. Supporting links can be added in comments or posted seperately but not to the post body.
3. No bots, spam or self-promotion.
Only approved bots, which follow the guidelines for bots set by the instance, are allowed.
4. Post titles should be the same as the article used as source.
Posts which titles don’t match the source won’t be removed, but the autoMod will notify you, and if your title misrepresents the original article, the post will be deleted. If the site changed their headline, the bot might still contact you, just ignore it, we won’t delete your post.
5. Only recent news is allowed.
Posts must be news from the most recent 30 days.
6. All posts must be news articles.
No opinion pieces, Listicles, editorials or celebrity gossip is allowed. All posts will be judged on a case-by-case basis.
7. No duplicate posts.
If a source you used was already posted by someone else, the autoMod will leave a message. Please remove your post if the autoMod is correct. If the post that matches your post is very old, we refer you to rule 5.
8. Misinformation is prohibited.
Misinformation / propaganda is strictly prohibited. Any comment or post containing or linking to misinformation will be removed. If you feel that your post has been removed in error, credible sources must be provided.
9. No link shorteners.
The auto mod will contact you if a link shortener is detected, please delete your post if they are right.
10. Don't copy entire article in your post body
For copyright reasons, you are not allowed to copy an entire article into your post body. This is an instance wide rule, that is strictly enforced in this community.
view the rest of the comments
Good, maybe politely* asking people out in public spaces other than "the fucking bar" will become acceptable again rather than creepy.
*To clarify, I mean stuff like "I think you look cool, wanna grab some coffee?" not like "Ay lemme taste the inside of your butthole gurl."
Aww man, throwing shade on my best lines, bruh
Lmao it seems 5 people agree with you. Sorry butthole tasters, I didn't mean to say I don't count myself amongst your ranks, as I most assuredly do. I only mean to say that leading with it is probably not the least creepy move one could pull in a grocery store.
So you're saying it's definitely not the worst, right?
Yeah it's only pepper spray bad, and if you play your cards right security won't put you in a leglock.
🥵 I think I need a cold shower now
Maybe women like not having men randomly coming up to them trying to express interest and pursue a date, and not having to deal with the fear of what they may do if rejected?
IDK I'm not a woman.
Women like not being approached by men they don't find attractive, but women also like being appreciated and approached by men they find attractive. And you can never know in which group you fall. And if you just always do what other people desire, you will never get anywhere in life.
Some people legitimately just want to be left alone.
Sure, then women should start approaching men. The apps are not the answer, social media is doodoo.
I don't think women really feel any differently about it than men do.
I agree, I'll be honest that's why I use these apps. Because when I'd try to just talk to a girl in person and be friendly I get the sense they think I'm either being creepy or want to get in their pants. When I'm just an introvert just trying to start up a conversation lol
I'm old enough to remember life before the apps. I could never figure out how to make that work. Approaching girls was stressful and hard and there was a lot of ambiguity because you'd need like some ulterior motive for talking to them and then would have to shift to dating which I never had the confidence to do. Like I'd offer to send her some class notes or something and I'd get her email. But then what?
Just walking up to a random girl and saying:
Would have an extremely low success rate I'm sure. Girls need to feel comfortable first, after all strangers who approach you in a public place tend to be people you'd rather not talk to. Now if you're at a bar and a friend introduces you and you have a conversation first, well that could work and it's kinda how my parents and older cousins met in the pre-app days. But if you're me in college and you're an engineering nerd and have only a handful of equally nerdy friends, those conversations are hard to come by. And that's the role the apps filled for me - the introduction.
You can still do that, but as rsuri says, you cannot be so direct. It's too confrontational and girls don't really appreciate that. You have to invent some plausibly deniable reason to start a conversation. This also gives the girl an out if she is not really interested. Then you just allude to your interest in her, which don't worry she will pick up on immediately. At some point you will either hear, "... and my bf and I" or you hear nothing of that genre. At the end you can ask for a number. That's not exactly the end of the story. Most of the time, the conversation continues through text only for her to drop you before a date is planned. But it's in any case a way better experience than Tinder, unless you're some hunk who can write "6'4" on Tinder and get 100+ matches.
No, it won't, because it has never not been creepy. People should be allowed to go into public without constantly being approached. The part you don't get is that being asked out for coffee once is novel, twice is fun, but after that it gets old really fucking quick. I do not want to have to deal with that every time I just want to do some fucking laundry.
And 90% of the people who do/did this are legitimately creeps.